Reddy Gets Jealous - Nikki Linfield

This book is from the reminiscences of Reddy Red Squirrel who hoped and dreamed of having a sibling. Reddy describes her own story: "This is a story about when I really wanted a sibling, wanted somebody to play with so much! And one day I got my wish! My own adoptive parents brought home a newer, younger sibling. "Soon after Little Grey Squirrel came to live with us, I felt disappointed. It seemed that having a little brother was not exactly what I had hoped. "My parents noticed I was feeling disappointed, frustrated, and angry. They recognized that I really felt very jealous. They kindly asked me about my feelings. They helped name my jealousy. Jealous of the attention and the seeming importance of the new little brother." In this primary caregiver (parent)-child therapeutic story the parent uses DDP-PACE to stay connected with the child's feelings. Reddy's parents noticed and named her feelings of disappointment as her hopes and dreams for a sibling were not as she expected. Through the story they offer Reddy acceptance, curiosity and empathy. Together they explored her feelings of jealousy when her new sibling joined their family. The book walks parents and children back and forth through, the feelings of jealousy. Reddy, the already-adopted child initially had no words for her feelings. The parents saw that the behaviours at home were their child's best effort to ask for help with new confused feelings. Acting younger, she returned to earlier developmental stages trying to re-establish inner stability and security. Reddy showed her feelings in anger, sadness and worry. Through connection and co-regulation her parents helped her make sense of her jealousy and understood how she needed them by her side.